Now, for my party

Bam! The door will fly open,
The star strutting into the grand ballroom,
The high chandeliers, the polished glass,
Refined cutlery, wine and steak
One long banquet table with two rows of guests
Formally dressed, present, at my request
Waiters, precise, swift and lacking in nothing
Courses fine-balanced and served in a zing
Applause, wild and loud, great ado about me
(The baron of grandeur, la vie du parti)

“Greetings, do take a seat, all who attend!
Was it too long a wait? I won’t pretend;
I am dearly busy, as most of you know
But let this fine night be one boisterous show!”

Champagne will drizzle, glasses will clink
Ladies swap gossip as gentlemen drink
Knives and plates meet, waltzers advance
Chevaliers dazzle, don juans entrance
A spiral of spirit and meal of euphoria
Flamboyance remembered, picturesque utopia
Turn upon turn of the feet and the arm
Quick-flying colours, lovers’ call to arms
A fierce fiery fight for the feisty and flutt’ring
Side-steps, pirouettes, sonorous we sing
Forte! Con mossa? Dolce? Sforzando!
Legato, staccato, viva, andiamo

Desolate, lost, I crumple to the ground.
Stumbling from stupor into what is real,
Drunk not on drink but on false fantasies
Sunken in dashed hopes and that
Which will never happen. Try, try
As I might, I cannot remove the cork
Sealing the bottle shut.

Things that I look at are always further away
Than I thought they were. Never within reach
Never more fake. The party is one more tale
To tell, to anyone willing to have a morbid laugh
Over whisky, over booze, over shared failures
With wispy hairs, weathered skin,
Lingering in the gap between life
And my decline, knowing
Crossover is inevitable. Now, now,

That’s my party.



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